Oh wow, this is potent! A memory came immediately to mind, age 14, cruelly excluded by two girls I considered my best friends. There’s an essay there. Thank you for this.
This hit something uncomfortable and very human. What fascinates me about exclusion is how quickly the body understands it—often long before the mind fully does.
I’ve done a fair bit of research on this for various book projects. The pain centers that activate around exclusion are the same as those that react to physical injury. It’s visceral and stems from the evolutionary need to belong to the group, both for personal safety and for the strength of the group. It’s not “just social”. It’s existential.
Oh wow, this is potent! A memory came immediately to mind, age 14, cruelly excluded by two girls I considered my best friends. There’s an essay there. Thank you for this.
Yes, it’s searing. The pain is real and the cycle can be so cruel😔
This hit something uncomfortable and very human. What fascinates me about exclusion is how quickly the body understands it—often long before the mind fully does.
I’ve done a fair bit of research on this for various book projects. The pain centers that activate around exclusion are the same as those that react to physical injury. It’s visceral and stems from the evolutionary need to belong to the group, both for personal safety and for the strength of the group. It’s not “just social”. It’s existential.
Exactly, Aimee. I think many people still underestimate how physical social experiences really are.